TanGOING around: where I like to take my tango out on a date and why

There’s a lot more to tango than taking classes and learning steps. 

I always dread at the thought of people who take a couple of group classes, or worse, private ones, and then say ‘Now I can tango’. Tango is a million things, many of which can hardly be described in words. But on this particular instance I am referring to the social connotation. Tango is a social dance and therefore should be experienced (and enjoyed) in crowds. It comes to life where there are groups. It is not solitary. It is intimately and intensely experienced inside oneself, but it cannot exist without an outer manifestation. Yes, it takes two to tango. That’s the start of plurality. The self must transcend and reach the other. Thereafter, the more the merrier: the bigger the crowd, the livelier the milonga. Lessons or classes are obviously valuable; it is the way to learn: by interaction with other humans, by actual physical contact with another (not imagined) partner; not by DVDs, watching youtube and reading books. Everything helps, naturally, but it is by trial and error, by discovery, by interaction, by dialogue and practice that knowledge is achieved. So go to class, apply yourself, question yourself, question your teachers! And whatever stands after the questioning is done goes. If it can be deconstructed, dissected and put back together for (respectful) use on the dance floor, I say it’s valid. Of course, thousands of voices may contradict me (or such statements) as to what is or isn’t tango. But that is not the subject in question. I’m not writing prescriptively, but descriptively. Or even more, introspectively.

Therefore, returning to the matter in question, if you can use it in the milonga, it’s good knowledge. And here ‘use in the milonga’ is the key phrase. Because of the collective nature. Tango is about sharing, not about individualisation. It is the fruit (and joy) of communion between people, not born in solitude. You acquire information in group classes, and polish it to your shape and size in private classes to fit you. But then you live it. Where? In milongas. Because that is the ultimate purpose of dancing tango. To share it, to live it with other people. As many people as possible. Hence, the ‘worse’ above. How crippled is tango lived between the same four walls of your house with the same partner and/or teacher over and over again?

So you must go out and live it!

On the other hand, having said this, it may seem as if you must pass through herculean trials and graduate multilevel courses to be able to say ‘Now I’m a certified tango dancer!’. In reality, there’s no such thing. Tango is as light or as hard as you take it. My feeling is that it should be taken both lightly and seriously at once. It should never be frightening and dissuading. Dancers, regardless of their level, should believe that they can dance. At all times. They should fill the milongas enthusiastically, unafraid of what they have to ‘show’, driven only by the eagerness to live it and enjoy it. Isn’t that why we learn to dance tango, to dance as much as possible? To DANCE as much as possible, to enjoy, not to show.

Stand by your KISS rule and you’ll be all right (Keep It Simple, Stupid!). It shouldn’t be made to seem difficult, and dancers should not fill themselves or allow themselves to be filled with frustrations or complexes. The beauty lies in its simplicity. Not its lack of complexity, but its effortlessness. Unfortunately, the natural, effortless is a state reached with a lot of hard work. As if you’re struggling with your own body, who is now (suddenly) working against you in your painstaking effort to be a being who walks, moves, turns in a natural casual manner.

Thereafter comes the seriousness of the matter. The more seriously you address it, the deeper you get, and the more strata reveal themselves to you.

So it is as serious as you want it to be. For some it is only dancing in milongas. For others it is years of endless study, practice, controversy, in search of their own tango. Which they still, nonetheless, take into the milongas. Even when the quest is not over (Is it ever?). They take their rough, wobbly, shaky version of tango out dancing. And they spend a perfectly enjoyable night together. Once more, the keywords are GO OUT and ENJOY.

So don’t acquire more and live less. It’s such a pity not to let others enjoy your tango! It’s as if you’d ascend to such a level of self-sufficiency that telling yourself ‘I dance tango in my mind and there’s nothing more I need’ would be all the gratification that you need in your tango life and the only pleasure you derive from tango.

Thus, starting from the premise that we must go somewhere to dance, we reach the second part of my soliloquy. Where to go and why. Nowadays there are various forms which tango encounters take. And none are to be dismissed I think. I will try to discuss them one by one, while showing the advantages and disadvantages of each, why you should attend them and what (not) to expect.

(I)                 The weekly/monthly milonga

Every community, irrespective of size and age, has (at least) one regular milonga. Or at least any should. For all of the reasons mentioned above. Tango should not (and cannot) live only within the walls of our homes, in the solitude of the youtube tango dancer. Watching is not living. Observation is part of the learning process, but until you are part of the ‘action’, until you actually dance, you are outside tango. A contemplating being, not a living one. So if the regular milonga is all you have, with the same dancers, the same venue, the same music, the same floor, the same lighting, all of which you’re sick and tired, then you don’t know how lucky you are to have them. The shortcomings are obvious, and I have just named them. In a word: monotony.

The advantage is the familiarity which, if you are smart enough to appreciate it, grows on you; how happy and grateful should you be on realising that you are lucky enough to have a precious treasure chest at home. You don’t need to look any further, there’s always an exquisite bite of some delicacy waiting for you in every corner of the local milonga: there’s the one who showed you that Di Sarli can also be danced like D’Arienzo (blasphemy! who would have thought?), then the one who showed you that there‘s more to tango than caminar (and it’s called giro), or the one whose embrace makes you forget to breathe or hear the music; oh and the one with whom you had so much fun dancing milonga that when the tanda ended you were surprised tango is legal. And then there’s that DJ who delights you with their newly dug up old (or late) D’Arienzo, or the one who plays a tanda of Fresedo especially for you, and the one who surprises you with this incredible version of Esta noche de luna… And let’s not forget the thoughtfulness of the host who welcomes you with a big smile and candle-lit tables on this occasion, a mug of mulled wine on that one, or a friendly breakfast to chase the weariness (and leaden feet) away on long Saturday nights. And last but not least, your local fellow dancers, with whom you share endless chatters about shoes or a few drinks and snorts over the endless chatter about shoes.

There’s the joy of warmth and familiarity, of being with friends, and because of that (and in spite of the monotony), if you allow yourself you can have some of the most amazing tandas of your life. All of this, and more, at home! Tango in your local community is by no means to be frowned upon. As you help it grow, it helps you grow.

TO BE CONTINUED